Pre-Exam Prep creative Purge

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   Sometimes you just have to get it out…

As I take an escape from real life, writing and studying and reading and studying and reading, I don’t want to do too many word related activities.  So, here’s a lil something I’m working on…early stages.  needs something… What’s missing??  I’ll get a hook together when I figure out what  it makes me wanna sing/say.

Hope you like it.

November Jas(in progress)

-Brookes

Key Changes, Sharps, Flats and Minor Chords…

Time for a music review. Why? Because I just heard a song on my iPod that forgot I had and it made me feel happy inside and well, I impulsively grabbed my computer to tell all of you about it. Good music.

For today we will be discussing RJD2’s Games You Can Win”. go ahead and enjoy and I’ll meet you right back here after the jump to discuss.

Now, if you know me personally, then you completely understand the relevance of today’s title and what appeals to me aesthetically in music. This song, with its easy listening and simple melody has just enough infusion of minor chords and sharps to make it one that I will play on repeat repeatedly for more rounds than my husband or daughter really care for…especially given that I will play it through all speakers in the house at very high levels. Music is an atmosphere and I enjoy feeling the vibrations. I’m not sure if I’ve told you all how much I LOVE music and I would be truly remiss if I failed to inform you that I do so LOVE music. Now that we’ve established that I have a relentless affinity for music and the quirks that make certain songs instant winners in my book, The lyrics to this song are cool as well. I cannot say that this song is reflective of his overall style and body of work, but he did quite well with this one. I have another clip or two below that kind of demonstrate the diversity in his body of work. RJD2 is an all American boy from Oregon, raised in Ohio according to the innernets who has made a career of producing, singing and as a musician. BTW, this is not new music, but it might be new to you! I hope you like and if not…well you’re welcome to your opinion, even if it sucks. Carry on.

-Brookes

More than a Game Changer, A NAME Changer

Two weeks ago was a random Thursday that became a very significant Thursday when the man of my life suggested we call our minister to see if he would have time to marry us that afternoon. And at three p.m. I became a Mrs.! Good stuff! Taking a break from law school apps to have my name legally changed, I now sit in the SSA office waiting for A35 to become A53 and I allow myself a moment to give the due consideration to the magnitude of what I’ve just committed myself to. I am changing my name. I am changing MY name!!! In moments I will have a new identity, I will invent a new person and my former identity ceases to be. Heavy. I know I will still be myself and it won’t improve my credit score either nonetheless…I give up my name for someone else’s.  While I’m sure a lot of women are as selective as I have been when it comes to identifying a potential husband, I wonder if they all really consider the magnitude of what we are giving up, the principal behind it all.  The following is likely a collection of disjointed ramblings, competing mildly related thoughts…ride wit me

Despite my charm, an IQ that qualifies me for MENSA and my LSAT score, good looks, quick wit and I could go on but I don’t like to brag, my life to this point has been one of many lessons learned, unexpected changes and well-earned bumps and bruises.  Simply put, while my achievements to this point may not get me in the Journal, it has been  a pretty epic ride.  But last Thursday, I jumped out the window, no parachute.  Him? Still a Mr., last name unchanged and he gained a live-in chef, a maid with mild cleaning related OC tendencies on top of all the other phenomenal woman/mother/wife stuff.  I definitely did not get the short end of the stick as he is pretty darn magnificent as well, but I have relinquished a great deal of independence in addition to the selfishness we all must give up.  I am now identified as a wife because of three letters and a period: Mrs.   I suppose for me the idea of packing up my place and changing my name is symbolic of packing up all of the history that contributed to me becoming Brookes, placing it into a box and moving into the next phase of my development, embarking on the next leg of the journey of life and it demands that I take a pause to reflect.  

My pastor recently mentioned the significance of taking the time to appreciate the season you’re leaving as you enter a new one.  So, as I move into the next season with an excitement that can’t be contained, anticipation of an even greater run than the last, fearlessness and a great deal of faith, I respectfully process all that has happened in the previous season, good and bad.  I courageously release all the habits and associations that don’t have a place in the new season, but I neatly pack all the heart-warming memories, the recollections that make me thank God for growth and for grace, the moments that built my strength and my character and prepared me for today and my future, the love and the laughs, and I tuck them away in the corners of my mind.  Feels like that moment at the end of Set It Off when Jada is sitting on the bed laughing and crying.  I’m not gonna shave my head and move to Mexico, but as I add the hyphen to my name it feels similarly.  Life.  What an amazing trip…LET’S GOOOOOOO!!!

Mrs. Brookes

Good Girl Gone Bad

We’ve all heard it before, and Rihanna is a walking billboard confirming the notion that once a good girl goes bad she’s gone forever.  I can identify with this statement myself.  I won’t bore you all with the events and circumstances that may have contributed to and led me to become a “bad girl”, but I can admit that for a period I squeezed into the proverbial clown suit* and performed my best bad girl impersonation…and rather successfully.  Depending upon when  a person met me they could easily have met two very different individuals. When the bad girl rap got old and I recognized that it just wasn’t all that fulfilling for me, I worked diligently to get back to my old self, fruitlessly.  Turns out the adage is pretty true.  

However, I have learned that while the good girl may be gone forever, you can be a great woman!  All of life is continuing education, ongoing training of sorts.  If you don’t like who’ve you become, don’t try to be who you were before, just work towards being the best person you can be now.  Search out the positive lesson or development that you can take from the parts of the journey you feel don’t represent you well, and hold on to that.  Life will continue to give you opportunities to evolve and develop into a greater person.  Just keep going!  The woman you become could be even greater than what the “good girl” in you aspired to become.  You weren’t meant to be the same person today as you were back then.  If you are still alive, which you appear to be, you were meant to live, grow, evolve, CHANGE!  Keep growing.  Hold onto the lessons and look forward.  Your future can be brighter than your past!!

-Brookes

*this refers to what one figuratively wears when operating in utter foolishness.  One might don the clown suit while on Spring break in college, or during an early 20s party girl phase, or on any given night that involves excessive drinking.

I Don’t Wanna Be Loved….I DON’T Wanna Be Loved??? Huh?

...oh the days when it was cool to love and value women.

I was listening to the radio the other day, which I rarely do, because no matter how much you like a song, you hate it when it is played every seven minutes and twenty-three seconds, and I heard this song that was jammin!  I turned the radio up, and started to groove, not so much listening to the lyrics, and then I heard the hook…I don’t wanna be loved, I don’t wanna be love, I just want a quickie….I found myself reminding myself to close my mouth.  I’m so disturbed because I can only imagine that this song is considered a contemporary “slow jam”….Someone’s lil girl is being seduced by some boy passionately suggesting that she be his quickie buddy, and that being able to separate feelings from sex is a sign of maturity. I would venture to say that in previous generations there were definitely girls who went for this, or felt empowered by being able to have meaningless sex, but it seems that this girl is quickly becoming the rule, not the exception?  Is that acceptable?  Perhaps this evolution isn’t an issue at all.  Where should young people learn about romance, and what they should expect from a mature romantic relationship?  Where did we learn this?

Is there anything on the airwaves for popular urban music that is giving this generation even the semblance of heterosexual romance or love?  Anything on these types of stations that might tell a young girl that when she grows up a young man will come along that she will fall in love with, who will show her that he loves her and wants to be with her and spend the rest of his life loving her?  Ok, well how about a song that will tell her that she has value beyond her sex appeal, sexual skills?  As I continued listening I found that the station was dominated with explicit sexual messages about the male prowess, ability to make a young lady wet the bed, make her legs shake, describing women as accessories, bros before hoes (super homo)mentality or “empowered” women spewing aggression and claims of finding pleasure in the use of whips and chains in sex.  There were very few exceptions.  Of course, the line up has to be no more than about 15 songs repeated throughout the day.  Recognizing that the listening demographic is likely 13-25 I have to ask what kind of character development this supports.  While I’m sure we can all agree that there is definitely a sector of parents that cannot be relied on to shape their child’s development along these lines, so is there a responsibility of artists to consider the messages they are sending?  Could part of the responsibility fall on the stations that air the music?  Or, am I just showing my age by even seeing an issue?  idk. let’s go!

oh yeah, guess who’s bizzack. I shouldn’t a left you, without a dope beat to step to!  

-Brookes

Coppin’ the “Right” Watch

You should get used to my quoting Jay-Z and song lyrics in general.  Can’t stop, won’t stop.  Take that, take that!  Anyhow, today we’re gonna talk about when we can stop doing what people say is what we should do to be who we want to be….

The title of this post uses a quote from “30 Something” by Jigga, where he attests to his own maturity by pointing out that he now buys the right watch instead of the bright watch.  What I’m wondering is if with maturity you just start to prefer the right watch, or do you learn what the right watch is and decided to buy it to demonstrate knowledge of what’s right?  It seems that people who are successful to the point of not being concerned or affected by the opinions of others are more inclined to do what they feel, like, cop the bright watch if that’s the one they like more.    When still dependent upon gaining the respect and approval of others to reach our goals we seem to alter our likings to the “right” stuff.  The. right place to work, the right car, the right watch, suit, shoes, hairstyle, jewelry, the right person to date/marry, the right fork to use and on and on and on  and on and…

I never much bought into this, except when it comes to tattoos.  Not sure why, but I always envision myself at some fancy shmancy formal dinner gala looking amazing, I mean absolutely stunning, until I turn around to reveal a huge tat of some gnarley vine over fish scales like a mermaid wrapped in ivy covering a huge portion of my back.  Now, social pressure isn’t the only factor keeping me from the needle.  tattoos are a commitment.  If I could get a semi-permanent tat, like hair color, I would totally do it!  I’d be totally tatted up!  

Anyhow, how do you guys feel like you sell out?  What do you do/not do, who do you date/not date, what stuff do you buy/not buy for the sake of social acceptance/pressures?

 

It was all good just a week ago…

Now, you wearing the same close two weeks in a row are wondering what happened?  You thought you guys would surely marry, have 2.5 kids, a dog and live happily ever after…as promised this post is about the tendency of men NOT to marry the chick who’s in their corner when all they have is potential.  We see this phenomena demonstrated in the stories of 85 percent of famous black men and it is strengthened by Kan-yeezy with the line “…and when he get on, he leave you @ss for a white girl”.  While it isn’t necessarily a white girl, we do recognize that more likely than not, if a chick is filling the role of wifey, without the rang, to the guy she may just be a “close bus” as so delicately titled by my homies over at verysmartbrothas.com

I don’t know any women, and I do know a lot of different types of women, who have been in relationships, who have managed to completely dodge being the close bus chick.  Everybody plays the fool.  Right? In every instance of womanly fool for love foolishness I’ve heard recounted the guy worked diligently to persuade her he was genuinely interested in her, through the expenditure of time, thoughtfulness, romantic gestures, etc.  She concedes, feeling secure that his feelings are substantive.  Having signed on, she begins to invest in the relationship as well, but over time, her investment increases as his decreases.  The woman does everything she can to show that she believes in the guy, loves him, breaks all her rules for him, gives into nearly every whim to make him happy, forsaking all good sense pride, in the name of love, only for the guy to recognize that she never really cut the mustard for him, but was sufficient until he could invest the time and resources to get the chick of his dreams they are unequally yoked and he can’t accept ______ (fill in the blank).  Devestated, the woman turns to the old adage suggesting she marry a guy who loves her more than she loves him, accepting that equality is a fantasy.  Being the dreamer that I am, I just can’t swallow that one yet, but I’ve seen it too many times.

After discussing said phenomena with a member of the male species a couple of months ago, I recognized a possible flaw in the female reasoning when it comes to love.  He explained that from his perspective, it should be evident to the woman who the guy isn’t looking at her in that manner.  Perhaps all the things that he is not doing in the relationship should indicate such, unfortunately, the minor things he IS doing help her to reason away sound reasoning.  It’s sad.

By and by, everyone CAN move on and find a love of their own.  These two will cross paths someday, share photos of the kids, reminisce for a moment and keep it moving.   Recognizing that it all comes out in the wash, everyone has the opportunity to be relatively happy, my only questions are for the fellas.  What causes the change and why keep her around after realizing you no longer see a future with her?  Is it possible that she loved you too much as suggested in “Run Away” when Kanye states a reason for not liking his woman as “you been puttin’ up wit my ish just way too long…”  ? 

Let’s find some understaaaanding.  Think back to your last close bus fellas, when did you find the expiration date on the relationship?  Was it her or you?  How much longer did it last after that revelation? Ladies, was this post complete and utter rubish?  Is this not the rule?  Let’s discuss!

-Brookes

We are just dumb..lol…all of us

  I think this should just be charged to the game…it’s a lot less personal than it seems, and at some point we all just sit down and stop searching for greener grass (hopefully).  It’s also just the way of the world…what good are you to anyone if you’ve never had a humbling experience or never had to recover from extreme heartache.  We’re just all essentially iron sharpening iron, right?…or that’s just what I tell myself.  I say treat um all like crap until you have a reason not to…there!!  Thats the issue right there…as women we are so eager for love…we are always trying to believe the best in men…many times we want more for them than they want for themselves.  If he isn’t shit in real life…why are we trying to make some fairytale life with him?  There were no not shit men in any of the Disney movies I saw growing up…none.  And he might not be an all around not shit man, but if he is exhibiting that behavior towards you…just know he isnt trying to be your man. 

-Z

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